My problem is similar - took a few times to "pair" the iPhone SE to my HP Laptop, but once paired ti still will not transfer anything (not pictures, music, etc)
I had an Android before this, and had no problems with Pairing and Connecting (transfers OK).
I also think my HARDWARE is not being kept up to date - MS Update Catalog has drivers listed that are Newer than what is on the laptop, yet HP is not sending updates.
If I download the .cab files, will installing them WORK, or might there be Compatibility Problems ?
SE is Model MP8P2LL/A - Firmware 6.60.00
HP is i3-5005U 2GHz 64-bit OS WINDOWS 10 Home ver. 1803 OS Build 17134.48
(btw - this update eliminated my MS Mouse - found drivers were from 2014 -- deleted the Bluetooth, re-scan HW in Device Manager, got the Mouse back --- earlier MS Updates messed with ICS, and Explorer (both had high CPU usage)